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Deliver

I've unwittingly lived my adult life with the deep, sharp fear that scarred my early childhood and teenage life. I've been left exhausted by an absence of trust, a gnawing uncertainty and frankly, a toxic co-mingling of physical violence and love. This has only brought unnecessary suffering; to myself and to those that I love. I have avoided actions that would bring much joy into our world, preferring instead to exist in a cognitive 'safe mode' and emotional isolation. I have clung oh-so tightly to familiar and unhealthy patterns, partly as a rough and worn comfort blanket - but mostly because the alternative meant getting closer to others. And that fucking terrified me.

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Deliver

1 min
The Confidence Trick

March 11, 2021

Remember this; you have no guarantee what action you take will be right or wrong. Yet the very thought of Doing Something lifts your spirits. It pulls you off the floor and dusts you down. Use that energy to navigate your situation. Take some joy in whatever the outcome may be; after all you helped create it.

1 min
Keep Going

March 10, 2021

Its taken a few rides on the emotional rollercoaster to develop this resolve, I can assure you. I've spent nearly five years carving out a life that aligns with my preferences. I'm not even sure if I'll reach that hallowed ground. And guess what, I don't think I'd have it any other way. This is my story, and it will play out as the universe intended it.

1 min
Turning Thirty Two

March 8, 2021

And at this point in my life, do I have any pearls of wisdom? I think I do. Seek new experiences. Trust your instincts. Take risks while you can. Fall in love. Look after yourself, both physically and mentally. Seize your opportunities. And most important of all, Never Stop Learning. That is the true nectar of life. I wonder if my Forty Two year old self would agree?

Friday Reflections, Volume I.

March 5, 2021

In those moments when you are passed from pillar to post, it is very easy to drop those tasks you really care about. It is very easy to switch off the brain and do what's expected of you. To conform. Yet I accept that this is all part of the journey. One of many ups and downs. One with breakthroughs where you least expect them, and setbacks that cut very deep.

1 min
A Fulfilling Life

February 23, 2021

This will feel more personal. Perhaps random at times. The intent in my heads feels more clear however. How on earth do I channel my energies into something worthwhile, and everlasting. Or something like that. ‍

1 min
Boards of Canada

February 15, 2020

I'm always up for brooding electronica. Boards of Canada offer that in spades. There must be something about the Scottish psyche, as we all seem to be attracted to melancholy and darkness. Works for me though because their work is bloody fantastic.