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A Better Place
What a difference a month makes. At the end of April I found myself in a real bind. I was struggling to maintain two seemingly separate parts of my life; the day-job me and the building-writing me. The two were utterly incompatible, I thought. How could I possibly use the strains and stresses of an unloved career to help propel my wider ambitions?
Well folks, turns out I was looking at matters back-to-front. The real question was there all along. How can I take the energy I gain from building / writing online and apply that to a rather analogue role (as a real estate project manager). At the very least it would make my day to day more interesting. And potentially open me up to opportunities of all shapes and sizes.
Forever Searching
Getting to that point was a little messy, admittedly. I had to face up to a few home truths and extinguish habits that were long past their shelf life. I could no longer run away when I lost motivation. From one job to another. From one city to another. From one country to another. That was the playbook of my 20s and early 30s. It took me on one hell of an adventure, for sure. But I could no longer be that journeyman.
To progress from my April dilemma then, I had to try something different. Instead I'm leaning into the situation. I'm playing to my strengths to create something better, for both me and those I work alongside. My partners, as it were. Originally I thought in very narrow terms; the cashflow from the day job would help support the digital dream. And that remains the case. But bigger forces are at play now.
Perpetual Motion
This site creates a cosmic flywheel. It generates an energy and motivation that is now spilling over into other parts of my life. Until very recently I utterly cherished the limited time I had to write. I'd wrap up a post with a sigh, knowing I had to return to a tired, greying corporate world. It felt like my real life extended to only 30% of my waking hours. Now I bring the colour of creativity into all parts of my day.
I use the skills and confidence I gain here to improve my performance as project manager. I'm building better processes. Better tools. Better communication styles. And the positive results feed back into my writing here. My two me's are very much intertwined. The increased satisfaction brings another great benefit; a calmer, quieter mind. And with it, more time and energy to build.
Signing out, Steven.
Photo by Harry Shelton on Unsplash.
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